Something in Return
by Sofa King Stupid
Summary: Above all else you hate to look weak. One shot.


**Title:** Something in Return

**Word Count: **690

I've been busy, but here's something to tide you over. After Christmas I should be done with a lot of things, so I'll hopefully have more time and energy to devote to writing.

I'm glad LWD isn't real. They'd hate me. :/

**Disclaimer: **Life With Derek belongs to people other than me.

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Right. Left. Right. Left. Breathe. Blink. Keep walking. Right. Left. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

Don't think. Whatever you do, don't think. But he's never been good at following his own advice. Thoughts fly across his mind at light speed, moving too quickly to grab onto, scattered and broken.

Get out of the trees. There are cars, with people with phones, if you walk ten feet to the left. But then they'll see you. Battered and bloody and weak. Above all else you hate to look weak. You stay hidden. Better to suffer alone.

A face is burned into his memory. He knows it intimately, more than he knows himself. But hours, minutes, seconds later and the clarity is already gone. Features blur and melt and vanish. How many freckles? A scar? A missing tooth? What color hair?

The world is spinning around me. It's an earthquake. The ground slams into me. What's happening? Why am I the only one feeling this?

Because that was no earthquake. And you're alone.

I lay still. The spinning won't stop, the world goes white.

Oh. Oh!

Breathe!

Do you understand? Do you see, now, what happens when you think? Stop! Numb! Breathe!

You're a robot. Hand, hand, to your feet. Get up. Take a step. Two. Right. Left.

This is your fault. If only you'd just run faster fought harder been better. This would never have happened. And you wouldn't be reduced to this pathetic nothing.

His soul had long since cut its losses and fled. Anyone else would have gotten the hint, but he'd always known that his heart was stupid. It beat on, the not so steady thumping a somber song in the back of his mind.

Just a few steps to the side. But no, no.

Damned pride!

Damned Derek!

Why yes, yes he is. And he can see them now. Did he not see the road? Why would he continue on this path? And it will never, not once, ever cross their minds that he is terrified, more so than ever. Because if he continues on and gets help and survives this mess of a night, what then? How many years more of suffering and nightmares and pity is he going to have to endure? And if he makes it through that alive and comes out the better…

What then?

The ground hits me again and this time I expect it. It's cold. I try to curl into myself but can't find the strength to move. My breath comes in short gasps.

When did I close my eyes?

The agony I feel is soothing. My entire body is glass, smashed and shattered until I'm a billion tiny pieces and you might as well give up trying because no matter how long you struggle, I'm really truly broken. Don't be upset, though; for eight dollars and tax you can replace me at your local supermarket.

I hear the high whirring of sirens. It comes closer, closer, passes me. It's silent.

I fade.

.

_I step out of the Prince and smile ruefully. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised."_

_The man jogs over and laughs. "Need some help?" I nod._

_He comes closer, casually. With some effort I pull the hood open and he places a hand on my back and leans in to look with me. The contact surprises me and I start to shift away, but his arm wraps around my waist and pulls me close. He's stronger than I am._

_His face moves in and rests gently on mine. "I can fix that for you. But I need something in return."_

_My fear paralyzes me and he takes it as an opportunity to drag me into the cover of the trees. I finally came back to myself and struggle desperately. It's like a mouse trying to overpower a tiger. I'm thrown cruelly to the ground and then he's on top of me, pulling down my pants. His badge digs painfully into my skin. _

_And even though I try not to, I cry. 'Shut up, shut up, you bitch! Someone will hear!'_

_We don't want that. What would they think?_

_Breathe. Breathe._


End file.
